[MIDWEST CITY, OK] The Center for Pharmaceutical Statistics in Midwest City, OK, reported this week that four out of five doctors prefer an all-expense paid vacation over prescribing a plant-based diet. The fifth doctor in the survey had no comment, and was busy packing for his annual, all-expense-paid Pfizer trip to Hawaii.
Lured by free pens and golf umbrellas, doctors across the U.S. admit that going on luxurious vacations two or three times a year is very nice and that, quote: “it sure beats not going on vacation two or three times a year.”
“I could never understand why my doctor was smirking when she was filling out my high cholesterol prescription every month,” said one patient in nearby Norman, Oklahoma. “Now I know. I hope she gets sunburned.”
Other patients interviewed were less shocked by the statistic. “I’d love to go on vacation,” said one man after a recent doctor’s visit. “Unfortunately, I can’t since my medications cost me over $385 per month and I have no insurance. But, what choice do I have? Really. I mean, give up bacon cheeseburgers? Are you insane?”
Doctors everywhere are choosing to grab their pads and pens and write prescriptions for many avoidable, and in some cases reversible, serious health issues. High cholesterol, Type 2 diabetes, erectile dysfunction, heart disease, and others are all manageable by switching to a plant-based diet (combined with regular exercise). However, it seems doctors prefer medicating over educating their patients.
Take two asparagus and call me in the morning, and …